Authenticity and Action: Two Essentials for Parenting Well
By Pastor Chuck Swindoll
The temptation of any child of vocational Christian ministers is to see the work of the ministry as just another thing, just a religious gig. Parent-ministers must break through the “stage show” perception of religious work if their children are to understand that this isn’t big business, a slick profession, or an entertainment arena where Mommy or Daddy puts on a performance.
The key word is authenticity—not perfection, for no one gets it right all the time, but being real.
Admit your faults, own them completely, ask for forgiveness, be quick to give it, allow children plenty of room to fail, and let them see you live your life behind the scenes with love, grace, and humor.
All of that takes time and effort, both of which will cost you productivity on the job. Consider it a priceless sacrifice . . . a permanent investment.
Disintegrating families have parents who refuse to face the severity of their children’s actions. Eli knew how horrible his sons had become, yet he did nothing!
I’ve seen parents in such denial that they cannot bring themselves to admit that their child has a serious problem with drugs or pornography or sexual promiscuity or stealing—behavior that most others would consider signals to stop and take immediate action.
Yet they act as though the crisis will resolve itself if given a little patience. Wrong.
If you have children who are young, you have those around you who are impressionable. Now’s the time to make your most important investment in them.
If you wait until they’re as tall as you, you will have already allowed them to sow seeds of self-destruction.
If your children are nearly adults, take responsibility for your part in their poor choices, then do whatever is necessary to save them. Because you’ve waited so long, there are few options that don’t have grave consequences. So consider the long-term, and do what you must.
It is never too late to see the signs and take action.
Copyright © 2025 by Insight for Living and Charles R. Swindoll, Inc. All rights are reserved worldwide.
About the author
Pastor Chuck Swindoll
Pastor Charles R. Swindoll has devoted his life to the accurate, practical teaching and application of God’s Word. He is the founding pastor of Stonebriar Community Church in Frisco, Texas, but Chuck’s listening audience extends far beyond a local church body. As a leading program in Christian broadcasting since 1979, Insight for Living airs around the world. Chuck’s leadership as president and now chancellor emeritus at Dallas Theological Seminary has helped prepare and equip a new generation of men and women for ministry.
