Overview:
The world can be a dangerous place for fathers. Temptation lurks around every corner. Instability threatens to knock us off balance and send us plummeting into darkness. We’ve become accommodated to a new idea of fatherhood in contemporary culture—a vision that is defined more by a father’s absence and distance than by his engaged and vibrant presence in the home. Fathers have too often been caught up in the malaise of day-to-day living. Tired from the long hours at the office, they have little resistance to several temptations common to dads. But what can be done to avoid the fall away from godly character?
Message Summary:
- Material Possessions: The temptation to substitute purchasing things for the family in place of offering a personal presence.
- Emotional Strength: The tendency to give one's best energy and creativity to the workplace, leaving only the "leftovers" for the home.
- Verbal Capability: The habit of delivering lectures rather than earning respect by being "quick to hear" and "slow to speak".
- Perfectionism: The desire to demand the impossible from oneself and one's children, which ultimately exasperates them [29–34].
- Sexual Drive: The danger of assuming one is immune to an affair, rather than mastering the lust that "crouches at the door" [35–37].
- Spiritual Faith: The temptation to underestimate the importance of personally cultivating the family’s spiritual appetite, rather than delegating it to the mother.
Message Key Facts:
- The "Muddy Banks" Analogy: Swindoll shares a terrifying story of walking into Lake Tahoe with his child on his shoulders, only to step off a hidden drop-off. He uses this to illustrate how temptations are subtle and invite men to go just "one step deeper" until they are drowning [9–12].
- Presence vs. Presents: Swindoll argues that while providing for a family is biblical, children will quickly forget the gifts (presents) but will never forget the father's presence in the bleachers or at the desk.
- The "Leftovers" Problem: Many men are innovative and energetic at work but come home exhausted. Swindoll warns that the family gets bored without the father's "innovative touch" and "zest for life".
- The Baseball Hall of Fame: To combat perfectionism, Swindoll notes that Hall of Fame baseball players only get a hit 3 out of 10 times. He challenges fathers to praise their children for "3 hits out of 10" rather than demanding a perfect score, which only discourages them [31–32].
- A Shield Against Adultery: Swindoll offers a practical tool for resisting sexual temptation: keep a picture of your family in your suitcase or on the hotel nightstand. He suggests that remembering the children who "take their cues from our lives" acts as a powerful deterrent [38–39].
- Authentic Faith: Swindoll shares a touching story of a boy from Alabama who introduced his father by saying, "My daddy loves Jesus." He emphasizes that children and wives deeply desire a father who genuinely loves God, rather than one who is merely religious or fanatical [43–44].
- Source Material: The sermon references Tom Eisenman’s book, Temptations Men Face, particularly regarding the lack of societal support for controlling materialism compared to gluttony or alcohol.
Message References:
- James 1:2–5: The opening text encouraging believers to consider trials an opportunity for joy and to ask God for wisdom.
- James 1:13–15: The explanation of the anatomy of temptation—that it comes from one's own lusts which entice and drag away.
- James 1:19–20: The command to be "quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to get angry," and the reminder that human anger does not produce God's righteousness.
- 1 Timothy 5:8: The biblical mandate for a man to provide for his own household.
- Ephesians 6:4: The command for fathers not to "exasperate" their children.
- Genesis 4:7: God’s warning to Cain that "sin is crouching at the door" and must be mastered.
