How Fights Are Started and Stopped

Message Summary:

In this practical message, Chuck Swindoll addresses the universal human tendency to fight rather than surrender. Drawing from his own “survival of the fittest” upbringing at Milby High School, Swindoll observes that humans are born with a “scrappy nature” that prefers going for the jugular rather than giving in,. Turning to James 4:1–10, Swindoll explores the root causes of conflict among believers and offers a counterintuitive biblical solution: surrender.

Swindoll identifies two primary sources of internal and external war. First is Inner Desire, or “pleasures that wage war in your members”. He explains that while desires for achievement or expression are not inherently evil, war breaks out when those desires are frustrated and we fight to get our own way. Second is Cosmos Motivation (worldliness), which Swindoll defines not merely as bad behavior, but as adopting the world’s philosophy that says, “I’ll do it myself,” resulting in hostility toward God.

The solution to stopping the fight is found in the promise that God “gives a greater grace” to the humble. Swindoll outlines the steps to humility found in verses 7–10: submitting to God, resisting the devil’s urge to assert oneself, drawing near to God for intimacy rather than gain, and taking sin seriously through mourning,,. The message concludes with the promise that those who humble themselves will eventually be exalted by the Lord, just as John the Baptist was exalted for decreasing so Christ could increase.

Message Key Facts:

• Quarrels vs. Conflicts: Swindoll notes that James uses two distinct words in verse 1. “Quarrels” refers to a general state of war, while “conflicts” refers to specific, individual skirmishes or battles.
• The “Pogo” Principle: To illustrate James 4:1, Swindoll quotes the cartoon character Pogo: “We have met the enemy and he is us.” The source of conflict is not usually the external situation, but the internal frustration of the self.
• Born Delinquents: Swindoll cites a report from the Minnesota Crime Commission stating that every baby is born a “little savage”—selfish, self-centered, and aggressive. This confirms the biblical view of human depravity and the natural instinct to fight.
• The TV Antenna Illustration: To illustrate how we refuse to surrender to God, Swindoll tells a story of a man slipping from a roof who asks God for help. When God says, “Let go and I’ll catch you,” the man responds, “Is there anybody else up there?”.
• Defining Worldliness: Swindoll argues that worldliness is not just a list of prohibited behaviors (the “dirty dozen”), but a philosophy of life that ignores God’s timing and methods in favor of manipulation and self-promotion.
• Obscurity and Leadership: Swindoll emphasizes that God’s best lessons are often learned in the shadows. Just as Moses spent 40 years in the desert and David was with the sheep, believers should let God open doors rather than pushing their way into leadership.
• Drawing Near to God: Swindoll shares a tender moment when his four-year-old son interrupted his study time not to ask for a toy, but simply to sit on his lap and “be near” him. This illustrates the type of intimacy God desires from believers in James 4:8.

Message References:

• James 4:1–10: The primary text, analyzing the source of quarrels and the command to humble oneself before God.
• James 3:1–12: The preceding context regarding the destructive nature of the tongue, which builds toward the conflict addressed in chapter 4.
• Isaiah 53:6: “All we like sheep have gone astray,” used to describe man’s insistence on going his “own way”.
• John 3:30: “He must increase, but I must decrease.” Swindoll uses John the Baptist as the ultimate example of one who humbled himself and was exalted by God.
• Proverbs (General): Swindoll references the wisdom of Proverbs regarding controlling anger and burying a fault rather than demanding rights.

Message Speaker:

Pastor Chuck Swindoll