Friends in Need

In this practical message drawn from the turbulent narrative of 2 Samuel 15–19, Chuck Swindoll dismantles the myth of independent living, arguing that "friends are essential, not optional." The sermon is set against the backdrop of one of David’s darkest hours: his son Absalom has stolen the hearts of Israel, forcing David to flee Jerusalem to escape assassination. Swindoll focuses on the moment David pauses at "the last house" on the outskirts of the city, stripped of his throne and dignity, desperately in need of support. Using the metaphor of a "Sheltering Tree," Swindoll explores how God provides specific individuals to shade us from the "blast of adversity." He guides the listener through the "gallery of friends" who stood by David when the rest of the world turned away. These include Ittai, a foreigner who pledged loyalty unto death; Zadok and Abiathar, priests who served by obeying David's difficult command to stay behind; and Hushai, who agreed to the dangerous task of spying on the usurper. Swindoll also categorizes friendship into four levels—acquaintances, casual friends, close friends, and intimate friends—noting that while our acquaintances are many, true intimacy is reserved for a precious few. The message concludes with the story of Dawson Trotman, illustrating that the highest calling of a friend is to be the one "always holding somebody up" when the waters of life threaten to drown them.

Message Key Facts:

• The "Sheltering Tree" Metaphor: Swindoll quotes a line from Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s poem Youth and Age: "Friendship is a sheltering tree." He describes friends as leafy limbs that protect us from the "winter's wind of loneliness" and the heat of the sun.
• The Four Levels of Friendship: Swindoll describes friendship using two diagrams:
  1. The "V" (Numbers): At the top (Acquaintances), the numbers are high. As you go down to Casual, Close, and Intimate friends, the numbers drop drastically.
  2. The "Roof" (Honesty): The diagram is inverted regarding honesty. We are least honest with acquaintances and totally honest with the very few intimate friends we have.
• The "Last House": Swindoll highlights 2 Samuel 15:17, where David stops at the "last house" while fleeing. This represents the "last ditch" moments in life where we have run out of resources and simply need someone to stand with us.
• A Gallery of Uncommon Friends:

• • Ittai the Gittite: A man from Gath (Goliath’s hometown) who, despite being a foreigner and former enemy, refused to leave David’s side, saying, "Wherever my Lord the king may be... there also your servant will be".
  • Hushai the Archite: A friend willing to play the role of a "turncoat" to defeat the counsel of Ahithophel. He served by going back into the danger zone.
  • Shobi, Machir, and Barzillai: Three men who met David in the wilderness with beds, pottery, wheat, and cheese because they knew the people were "hungry and weary." They represent friends who meet practical needs without being asked.
  • Joab: The friend who "cared enough to confront." When David was paralyzed by grief over Absalom’s death, Joab risked the King’s anger to snap him out of it for the sake of the nation.

• Submission to Sovereignty: Even in flight, David displayed a teachable spirit. He sent the Ark of the Covenant back to Jerusalem, stating that if God delighted in him, he would return; if not, "let Him do to me as seems good to Him".
• The Dawson Trotman Illustration: Swindoll closes with the story of the founder of The Navigators, who died saving a girl from drowning. A caption in Time Magazine later described his life perfectly: "Always holding somebody up".

Message References:

• 2 Samuel 15:1–6: Absalom’s conspiracy to steal the hearts of the men of Israel.
• 2 Samuel 15:13–17: David flees Jerusalem and pauses at the "last house."
• 2 Samuel 15:19–21: Ittai the Gittite pledges his loyalty to David.
• 2 Samuel 15:25–26: David sends the Ark back, entrusting his future to God’s sovereignty.
• 2 Samuel 16:16–19 & 17:7–14: Hushai infiltrates Absalom's court to frustrate his plans.
• 2 Samuel 17:27–29: Shobi, Machir, and Barzillai bring provisions to David at Mahanaim.
• 2 Samuel 19:1–8: Joab confronts David for grieving Absalom at the expense of his loyal soldiers.
• 1 Corinthians 15:33: "Do not be deceived: Evil company corrupts good habits" (quoted regarding the impact of friends).

Message Speaker:

Pastor Chuck Swindoll